Replacing Fear with Love

Hello again everyone! Happy October! I think October can be one of the most GLORIOUS months and I love to watch the leaves change into vibrant hues of orange, red, and yellow. It’s such a nice change for the eyes on our daily dog walks.

This Fall everything seems a little different, maybe strange is a better word. We are still wearing masks to the grocery store and washing, washing, washing those hands. When we aren’t washing, we are sanitizing! Little by little, all of this has become the “new normal.” We can adjust to the changes in our lives in a variety of ways, but are we still thriving? Are we really living anymore? Or has the fear crept back in? It is so important not to let the fear from what could happen, stop you from living your life with joy and vigor.

I know for me, that fear has found its way back into the cracks in my foundation. Sometimes we don’t even know that the anxiety and fear is back until we hit a certain point, and that’s OK! That is why I have tools that I love to share for when you feel like you may be starting to get a bit off balance, or lets be honest, totally out of whack!

It is becoming increasingly more difficult to stay mindful in a society that is always refreshing the feeds, updating information, and broadcasting breaking news from multiple mediums, some totally unreliable. For people who are more prone to anxiety, this is totally overwhelming. Since we are stuck inside the home more these days, it may feel tempting to be on social media more or have the news on in the background. The problem is that we are feeding ourselves these messages the same way we feed ourselves lunch. Our nutrition for the whole person in yoga (also known as the koshas) includes everything that we take in on a physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual level. The things that we feed ourselves, determine our state of mind and our overall health of the mind, body, and spirit. For example, if I listen to the news for awhile, lament with friends over the phone, and scroll through Instagram in a day, I am bound to feel pretty anxious. This is NO surprise. Look at what I am taking in. Here’s a hint: FEAR, FEAR, FEAR!  We do not need that. Just the other day I received an article from one of the maternity apps I use that was completely “fear porn.” It was written to work moms up, not prepare them for their upcoming births at the hospital. When I shared some of the points from the article with my doctor, he assured me that it was not true and that the hospital has really great protocols and they have been totally safe. He told me he has, in fact, delivered 20 babies whose moms’ were positive for COVID and they are all currently healthy and recovered.

Since the outbreak of the pandemic, our society has been feeding off of fear, so it’s easy to feel anxious and scared during this time! Here is a wonderful reminder for you today: YOU ARE NOT YOUR FEARS. You are light and you are love and fear is a temporary state that passes as we learn to trust and love ourselves more and more. Take some of Louise Hay’s advice. She is my absolute favorite reference to call upon regarding fear. She says:

“Fear is becoming rampant on the planet. We can see it every day in the news. Fear is a lack of trust in ourselves, and because of this, we don’t trust Life. We don’t trust that we’re being taken care of on a higher level, so we feel we must control everything from the physical level. Obviously, we’re going to feel fear because we can’t control everything in our lives.

Trust is what we learn when we want to overcome our fears. It’s called “taking a leap of faith” and trusting in the Power within that’s connected to Universal Intelligence. Remember, the Power that supplies our breath is the same Power that created the Universe.

You’re one with all of Life. The more you know how to love yourself and trust Life, the more that Life will love you, support you, and guide you. You can trust in that which is invisible, instead of trusting only in the physical, material world. I’m not saying that we do nothing, yet if we have trust, we can go through life much easier. We need to trust that we’re being taken care of, even though we’re not physically in control of everything that’s happening around us.”

If you want to read the rest of the article, click here for the full link.  I highly recommend bookmarking it and re-reading it when you feel fearful or lost. By the way, Louise died years ago, so I get chills reading this now as it is so relevant to our current climate. It just goes to show you that history is always repeating itself. There will be other catastrophes and struggles, the only part that we can control is our own mindset and how we react to the fear.

My most pertinent take away today is that it is perfectly normal to feel fearful and anxious right now. In fact, it is valid to feel anything or nothing at all. The important part is to acknowledge what is coming up for you. Take a moment to sit with it just like you would sit with a loved one on a park bench. Get close to it and breathe deep. Accept what is coming up and then attempt to understand it. Maybe you need more downtime? Maybe you need to see a friend or take a walk under the trees. Emotions are always changing and that is healthy and normal. It is how we relate to those emotions and how we react versus respond that determine our overall well-being. The most critical thing we can do is examine our belief systems around what is coming up and then after some reflection and thought, figure out if those belief systems are not serving us anymore.

Once you have examined the emotion or thought more carefully, try and replace it with an alternate thought or feeling. Instead of fear, I am going to breathe in faith and love and let it override that fear. You could also use an affirmation each time the unsettling feeling or emotion comes up. Personalize your affirmation so that it feels powerful and true. In the case of fear, I love to use the following affirmations:

“I trust in the universe”

“I am safe, healthy, and strong”

“I release my fears ad fill up with love”

Here are some other useful tools to keep you grounded during this time:

  • Try journaling and writing out how you are feeling, but then coming up with alternate responses and affirmations to release negativity 
  • Take a social media break 
  • Try noticing something new every time you go for a walk. Make an attempt to mindfully walk and notice the smallest details, like the way the leaves grow up a vine or the color of someone’s front door.
  • Call a friend and have a laugh. Even better laugh with someone in person 
  • Get out a piece of paper at the start of each month and write down two things that are weighing you down, and two things that you can replace them with. Focus on these two themes for the whole month. For example, this month my fear of not having enough and my fear of not doing enough are weighing me down. I will replace them with abundance and acceptance.

Remember, we are not our fears. We are beacons of white light and love. The things that are changing in this world will always be changing, so if we attach to them we will suffer. If we choose to focus on our internal being, our inner climate, we can stay calm amidst the chaos. 

Trust that the universe has your back. Trust that when you are struggling, there is some lesson, some teacher, and that the pain and suffering is only temporary. 

Please feel free to reach out and tell me what you are doing to support yourself. I am still offering virtual sessions via Zoom, first session free for new customers. In just a few weeks I will take a break from working to nurture the newest chapter of my life, a baby girl.

Selfie after we took our maternity photos this weekend. My husband is my rock and a wonderful source of support.

A little life update: I am about 7 months pregnant and really feeling the emotions of becoming a mother. It has been a blessing to carry this baby during this time. She is my beacon of hope. When I become a little more stressed, I remember that I want to serve my highest good so that I can serve her highest good. It is so cool to meditate with another life form inside of you. I am sending her as much good energy as I can, and I extend it out to all of you as well!!

If you are expecting or know someone who is, please consider joining my prenatal yoga group via Zoom! You can sign up using Schedulicity by clicking here:

https://www.schedulicity.com/scheduling/EYTSQE

Stay safe, keep trusting, and let your love be so much bigger than your fear.

With love and kindness,

Maddie Tuohy 

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